Of all the words in the English language...

[nanila]

I was sitting peacefully on my train home this evening. I decided I couldn't cope with Boswell's Life of Samuel Johnson just then. I opted instead to melt my brain by doing the puzzles in the Evening Standard - which is the only reason I pick up the Evening Standard because I certainly don't read the damn thing - when this happened. And I gawped at it for a while in disbelief. And then took photos of it. And then gawped at it some more.

And then decided the interwebs needed to know about it.

I...just...you REALLY couldn't find yourself a less loaded word to put in your crossword puzzle, ES? REALLY?! WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH 'NEARS'?

Comments

[gorgeousnerd]

WHAT.

[nanila]

EXACTLY

[gorgeousnerd]

I JUST. HOW IS THAT REMOTELY OKAY.

[nanila]

I WOULD VENTURE TO SUGGEST THAT IT IS NOT

[chickenfeet]

I was looking at Times crosswords from the 70's yesterday when this one came up...

Opening for an Oriental (5)

[nanila]

I was once asked if I was Oriental. I replied that I wasn't a carpet.

[chickenfeet]

"Oriental" is the least of it

[nanila]

Wait, you mean the answer isn't "Aloha"? I am sad.

[capri]

...what is an opening for an Oriental?

[chickenfeet]

Chink - don't say I didn't warn you!

[capri]

Ah. Well. The "opening" bit throws me off. "Oriental" is never applied to me even though I am technically from the part of the world that would qualify - it's like discrimination within discrimination!

[chickenfeet]

The Times is a cryptic so each clue contains the answer twice. Usually that's as a straightforward (more or less) way and a very indirect way. Occasionally, especially for short clues one gets a simple double definition as in this case; "chink"meaning both "oriental and "opening". More typical would be something like (from today's Guardian):

General having fit behind Churchillian salute (5)

Answer = "vague"

"vague" meaning "general" and

"Churchillian salute" = v plus "having a fit" = ague

[capri]

Cool! I didn't know that. I mean, these is a rather unfortunate context to be learning things in, but still good.

[springheel_jack]

OMG Loved the Life of Johnson!

[nanila]

Yes! Me too! But my goodness, how do you resist underlining EVERYTHING. I feel like I'm not doing it justice if I don't give it my undivided and fully alert brain. Which I certainly didn't have this evening.

[springheel_jack]

That is definitely the problem! Well, "problem."

We should form a club of people who've actually read this.

[nanila]

Well, I'm only 1/3 of the way through so I can't join the club yet. But I'm planning to spend all of my winter holiday devouring the rest.

[springheel_jack]

It just gets better.

I'm going to name my next cat "Hodge."

[mme_hardy]

I get to join! Also Tristan Shandy! More exclamation points!

[liseuse]

OH MY ... WHAT?

[nanila]

I THINK IT MIGHT BE ANGRY LETTER O'CLOCK

[liseuse]

THAT SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN. PERHAPS AN ANGRY LETTER CAMPAIGN?

[nanila]

I FULLY ENDORSE OTHER PEOPLE WRITING ANGRY LETTERS TO THE ES ON THIS TOPIC

[liseuse]

I FEEL LIKE I HAVE BEEN INSPIRED TO WRITE AN ANGRY LETTER.

[ankaret]

This is my speechless and also heartily disapproving face. WTF.

[nanila]

I had that face on for about an hour. Now I have my angry letter-writing face on.

[mme_hardy]

I hope you get a thoughtful and appropriate answer.

[lark_ascends]

WHAT THE FUCK???!!???!!

[nanila]

Yes. Your icon says this perfectly.

[ajnabieh]

Wow. I mean, just...wow.

Do you mind if I pass this along to UK friends who might be up for angry-letter writing along with you?

[nanila]

I don't mind at all. I think it would be good for the ES to know that more than one person cares about racial insensitivity.

[azurelunatic]

I found their Twitter address and found a few things to say.

[nanila]

GO YOU. Thank you for that. I've had to lock my Twitter feed for work-related reasons, so is much appreciated.

[azurelunatic]

WHAT THE EFFING CRAP. (I phrase this not to dilute the spirit of my howl, but on account of the way the phrase from the Literal Total Eclipse of the Heart vid has wandered into my lexicon for the sheerly unexpected outrages of the moment.)

[nanila]

Oh, I just thought you were easing the transition from us addressing one another entirely in capslock! ;D

[alwayswondered]

What the fuck. D:

[nanila]

It is FAIL with extra FAILsauce on top.