Mostly this is an excuse to post a photo of my cat.

[Telstar pities the fool who does not know how to use a bright yellow bath mat.]

Also, cunningly concealed in this poll is the correct answer to a long-running dispute that I, that is to say, a friend of mine has with another friend.

Poll #12827

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: Just the Poll Creator, participants: 31

The best application of a bath mat is as

a thing to step on when you exit the bath.
12 (40.0%)

a cat blanket.
18 (60.0%)

I hand you a biscuit. You are delighted because it is a

bourbon cream.
19 (70.4%)

custard cream.
8 (29.6%)

You catch your significant other reading the comments. The correct response is

to shut their laptop and then sit on it.
31 (100.0%)