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quoththeravyn asked me five questions as part of that meme that does the rounds now and again, and I got so wrapped up in answering one of them that I figured it deserved its own post.What motivates you to share your life with relative strangers on the internet?
- It's part of the world inside my head. As I imagine most of the people reading this do, I spend most of my time being silent, in my head with my thoughts. When I'm at work, I sit in an office with other people who are mutely absorbed in their work. When I sit on trains, I'm with people who are absorbed in books/laptops/newspapers. When I'm with the bloke, we are often sitting together doing quietly meditative things. None of these are unfriendly environments, but they are all silent. A good deal of living, for me, is internal. The internet has always felt like a very natural extension of that inner world. Access to it via a physical interface is so swift and simple that I almost don't notice it.
- It feels safe. I know that being so open has risks, but my online experience, as I mentioned not long ago, has largely been positive. I share things on my journal - my paintings, my photos, intimate personal stories that sometimes don't reflect well on me - and the reaction from my stranger/friends has always been thoughtful, supportive and kind.
- It's part of being a "global" citizen. I've spent very few years of my life in any given location. I'm accustomed to my friendships, the ones that have spanned years and countries, involving very little face-time for long stretches. I'm happy to maintain cerebral connections to the people I love via this medium. Even when the communication is one-sided. I tend to concentrate my need for physicality in one person. This may or may not be healthy, but it's my solution to the regular geographical uprootings that I undertake.
- It lets me be randomly generous. I have occasional urges to, as the saying goes, give the world a Coke. I don't have the resources to carry out anything on that scale, but I can send my flist/dwircle postcards, magnets, pretty pictures of Saturn and paid account time.
- This community belongs to me. Whatever else happens in my personal life, I have this. I have this group of somewhat haphazardly collected folks, some of whom I've never met, others but once or twice and a few with whom I've spent significant time in meatspace. They read what I write here, and they care about it. I reciprocate. I depend on this, and it comforts me to know it's here.
- And finally, crucially, where else am I going to put all these cat pictures?
So, flist/dwircle, why do you share your life on the internet?
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My sympathies. I knew I shouldn't have scheduled the Iceland and sailing holidays so close together. I'm actually procrastinating on going through the photos by doing work, for goodness' sake. That's pretty desperate. :P
I remember your Hawai'i photo post! I'm quite envious that you saw sea turtles. I never have.
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I've spent a fair amount of time compartmentalizing the things I'm willing to share and with which audiences. I don't use it that much, but my access filter system is complicated and carefully considered.
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(P.S. I've been meaning to tell you - I got the magnets in the post a week or so ago, thank you! I sent a postcard in reply but I don't know if you've received it yet, I am slightly worried I read your return address wrongly or something. UK postal codes intimidate me.)
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I share things on the internet mostly because of this but also because I am not terribly good at general social interaction and yet somehow sharing on a journal makes that easier. Possibly because it is my community that I am sharing these things with? Hmm, that needs more thinking about.
And you are quite right - where else would one put all those cat pictures? :)
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Yes. It gives time to think through what you're going to say and refine it in a way that most people would probably find tedious if you tried to do it conversationally.
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Because, connecting and sharing is how we go from being strangers to being friends, and it doesn't matter where we do that.
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But it does make it a lot easier when people ask me how I met so and so and I say "online".
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Heeeee heeeeeee heeeeeeee.
Support, often from very like minded people. To share my photos, triumphs, sadness... I find it hard to talk about what's really going on in my head, when I'm really really upset in particular, with people in real life. For some reason, I have no problems sharing it on LJ/DW, and that gives me the outlet I need to cope.
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YES. I would add this to my list as well. When I try to talk about problems, hopes or dreams, I almost always seem to fail at saying what I mean. When I write them down, on the other hand, I have time to wrestle the words into the right order. And when I don't get it quite right, my community will help me to fix it.
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