20200215_092036
[Snippet of a log book entry featuring delicate pencil sketches of guinea pigs dressed for variable weather]

We’re currently holed up in a cottage in south Wales, listening to Storm Dennis howling outside. This is the bloke’s fortymumbleth birthday, so we’re following our tradition of going to a Landmark Trust (LT) property for the weekend.

LT properties don’t provide televisions or wifi, and are mostly in remote locations. A few years ago this meant you were properly cut off from the internet unless you were organised and downloaded a bunch of stuff onto your mobile devices before you left. Mobile coverage is now so good in 99% of places that this doesn’t work. For the adults, though, it helps a little with cutting screen time, since the main point of these weekends is sitting around the fire, snacking on all the tasty food we brought with us and plundering the bookcase.

Amongst my favourite items in the bookcases are the log books. My obsession with them began in the first LT property we stayed at, St Winifred’s Well Cottage, also in Wales. The log books there were things of beauty and frankly have not yet been surpassed. The artwork people drew and the little photos they stuck in were skilful and touching. Log books at subsequent properties have ranged from entertaining to mildly disappointing.

There’s an element of one-up-manship in most of the log book entries. For instance, “We walked 36 miles today and saw 8 different historical sites, even though it was pissing it down with rain! We observed 28 species of bird, one of which was the rare hoopentootle. PS Correction to the Thomas family entry on p36, Oct 1987: The notable feature in the Church of St Parpenfoogle is a cryptoporticus, not a cloister.”

I would like to start a tradition of one-down-manship. If I may suggest to future LT visitors the following:

  • “Thought about walking up to the historical site 200 metres from here. Couldn’t be arsed. It was cold.”
  • “Started 500 piece puzzle, completed by the Smiths and the Browns in 2.5 hours and 3 hours respectively as meticulously recorded on the inside of the box lid. Gave up after 30 minutes and put it back in the box.”
  • ”Didn’t bother working out how to light the legendarily temperamental fire. It’s July.”
  • “Tried to eat all the food we brought with us. Even failed at that.”
  • “Wrote a poem about the cottage. It’s even worse than the limerick penned by Brian Wu, Age 10 ⅓, so I won’t share it.”
  • ”Saw some pigeons. Didn’t count them.”
angelofthenorth: Two puffins in love (Default)

From: [personal profile] angelofthenorth


*laughter*

If you're where I think you are, you're only about 10 miles from me :) I love the idea of one-down-man ship :)
angelofthenorth: Two puffins in love (Default)

From: [personal profile] angelofthenorth


S'ok, I understand full well the weather in these parts :)
rmc28: Rachel in hockey gear on the frozen fen at Upware, near Cambridge (Default)

From: [personal profile] rmc28


I love your one-down-manship, also now I have an urge for tasty food.
corvidology: Cuppa from Sean of the Dead ([EMO] CUPPA)

From: [personal profile] corvidology


You might start a whole new tradition - entries will start being things like "we slept the whole time."
perennialanna: Plum Blossom (Default)

From: [personal profile] perennialanna


Though the most daunting visitor's book I ever got handed was after a retreat at a monastery. Looking at what other guests wrote, I found that other guests included most of the great and good of the Anglican hierarchy. Archdeacons, college principals, even an Archbishop (of course they included their jobs. Of course).

"I am a divorced single mum on benefits, working as a school dinnerlady in a tough school in one of the country's most impoverished areas. It was nice and quiet here" was not quite what I wrote.
brainwane: My smiling face, including a small gold bindi (Default)

From: [personal profile] brainwane


Loved this post and showed it to my spouse so we could enjoy it together.
silveradept: A kodama with a trombone. The trombone is playing music, even though it is held in a rest position (Default)

From: [personal profile] silveradept


I very like your one-down idea and trying to make things less competitive between the people staying in the space.
marymac: Noser from Middleman (Default)

From: [personal profile] marymac


My niece. But she is seven and impressionable and somebody showed her The Count off Sesame Street over Christmas.
slemslempike: (Default)

From: [personal profile] slemslempike


Love the downsman ship! My family once stayed at a place where the previous occupants had waxed lyrical about how they had had such a wonderful party with all their extended family, childern all squeezed into bed upstairs while the adults drank on, and the owners had left a terse comment next to it saying "clear breach of occupancy contract. Deposit forfeited@.
antisoppist: (Default)

From: [personal profile] antisoppist


Are you flooded? And if not, can you get home? Though it would be the ultimate entry for the visitors' book.

I love visitors' books but you are right that they bring out the competitiveness in that sort of people. I support refusing to have anything to do with it.
askygoneonfire: Red and orange sunset over Hove (Default)

From: [personal profile] askygoneonfire


I'd suggest theres a lucrative publishing contract in compiling the best of such log book entries with particular attention to both one-up and one-down manship. Who doesn't love reading very British beefs.
askygoneonfire: Red and orange sunset over Hove (Default)

From: [personal profile] askygoneonfire


For fun, and also the delight of your readers!
.