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Hello! It is, I dunno, midnight or something after solstice, and I have insomnia because despite trying to calm down with not-quite-paying-attention-to the Ab Fab and Father Ted Xmas specials afterward, I am still pissed off by the Masterchef: The Professionals Finale. Because there was rampant sexism, OK?
So, before you read any further, if you care at all about being spoiled about the winner of Masterchef: The Professionals, then read no further until you have watched it. If, like 99.99% of the Earth's population, you don't give a damn about that, then read on.
There were three finalists: Craig, Louisa and Steven. Craig was the youngest contestant (though he didn't look it) at 21, and had one of those faces my mind was constantly struggling to maintain a memory of. He was just...forgettable. Louisa, at 22, was second eldest. She was MAGICAL. And I don't just mean that because she was the only woman. Carry on reading and you will see. Steven was the only one on the whole programme with a sense of humour. A lovable teddy bear. Not the finest haute cuisine chef, which is why he didn't win the thing, but definitely the only one to whom my response was, "When he opens his restaurant, I want to eat there."
So anyway, the winner was Craig, because fucking Marcus Wareing (tosser) thought he was a "genius", and repeatedly said so. I don't deny that Craig's food looked and (from the sounds of it at least) tasted like something you'd get in a Michelin-starred restaurant of today. And that, to me, was the problem. He, with his granitas and his liquid nitrogen whatevers, was making exactly the sort of food you'd expect there, now. There was not much he served that I was surprised to see.
Louisa, on the other hand, was perhaps not doing all that which is of the zeitgeist, but she was doing things that Marcus Wareing "had never had before" although given that that was his favourite/most overused gushy anticipatory statement of the show, perhaps didn't mean much. ANYway, the point is, she used a lot of ingredients that were taken from non-European cuisines and blended them successfully with those that were, in unusual and apparently delicious ways. And her presentation was just as modern/de rigueur as Craig's. She is creative, dedicated, flexible, incredibly confident, commanding, attentive and prodigiously talented.
Steven was the only chef who actually looked as if he enjoyed eating as well as cooking food, which is always a bonus as far as I'm concerned. I don't think he was ever going to win the thing, being (a) far too chilled out and (b) actually in possession of a sense of detachment from the competition, like, "this is nice but it is not life-defining in any way". And his food reflected those qualities.
Anyway, the judging of the final was super annoying, because Marcus Wareing was just glaringly sexist throughout. He gushed over Craig as a "genius", and whilst I'm not denying the lad clearly has talent, at least from the appearance and alleged complexity of the dishes, Louisa was at least equally deserving of the moniker. But did she get it? Oh no. His praise for her was much more along the lines of, "Well done you clever little lady, isn't it wonderful that you're here."
Well.
Fuck you, Marcus Wareing. Those of us who have been around long enough to see that sort of bollocks from the people we work with recognise exactly how demeaning that kind of "praise" is.
So, I am hoping that in five years or less, the following events will occur.
1) Marcus Wareing will be removed from Masterchef: The Professionals for apparently never having actually enjoyed any foodstuff that is not a very small deviation from classical French cuisine.
2) Louisa, having opened her new restaurant which is receiving the same sort of accolades for innovation as Noma, receives a request for a booking from Marcus Wareing, which she politely declines.
3) Steven, having opened his wildly popular restaurant which serves whacky reconstructions of English pub favourites, gets a call from Louisa re: Item 2). He promptly adds to the menu a new recipe he has been saving for the occasion: Marcus Wareing's Sloppy Spotted Dick.
THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT.
So, before you read any further, if you care at all about being spoiled about the winner of Masterchef: The Professionals, then read no further until you have watched it. If, like 99.99% of the Earth's population, you don't give a damn about that, then read on.
There were three finalists: Craig, Louisa and Steven. Craig was the youngest contestant (though he didn't look it) at 21, and had one of those faces my mind was constantly struggling to maintain a memory of. He was just...forgettable. Louisa, at 22, was second eldest. She was MAGICAL. And I don't just mean that because she was the only woman. Carry on reading and you will see. Steven was the only one on the whole programme with a sense of humour. A lovable teddy bear. Not the finest haute cuisine chef, which is why he didn't win the thing, but definitely the only one to whom my response was, "When he opens his restaurant, I want to eat there."
So anyway, the winner was Craig, because fucking Marcus Wareing (tosser) thought he was a "genius", and repeatedly said so. I don't deny that Craig's food looked and (from the sounds of it at least) tasted like something you'd get in a Michelin-starred restaurant of today. And that, to me, was the problem. He, with his granitas and his liquid nitrogen whatevers, was making exactly the sort of food you'd expect there, now. There was not much he served that I was surprised to see.
Louisa, on the other hand, was perhaps not doing all that which is of the zeitgeist, but she was doing things that Marcus Wareing "had never had before" although given that that was his favourite/most overused gushy anticipatory statement of the show, perhaps didn't mean much. ANYway, the point is, she used a lot of ingredients that were taken from non-European cuisines and blended them successfully with those that were, in unusual and apparently delicious ways. And her presentation was just as modern/de rigueur as Craig's. She is creative, dedicated, flexible, incredibly confident, commanding, attentive and prodigiously talented.
Steven was the only chef who actually looked as if he enjoyed eating as well as cooking food, which is always a bonus as far as I'm concerned. I don't think he was ever going to win the thing, being (a) far too chilled out and (b) actually in possession of a sense of detachment from the competition, like, "this is nice but it is not life-defining in any way". And his food reflected those qualities.
Anyway, the judging of the final was super annoying, because Marcus Wareing was just glaringly sexist throughout. He gushed over Craig as a "genius", and whilst I'm not denying the lad clearly has talent, at least from the appearance and alleged complexity of the dishes, Louisa was at least equally deserving of the moniker. But did she get it? Oh no. His praise for her was much more along the lines of, "Well done you clever little lady, isn't it wonderful that you're here."
Well.
Fuck you, Marcus Wareing. Those of us who have been around long enough to see that sort of bollocks from the people we work with recognise exactly how demeaning that kind of "praise" is.
So, I am hoping that in five years or less, the following events will occur.
1) Marcus Wareing will be removed from Masterchef: The Professionals for apparently never having actually enjoyed any foodstuff that is not a very small deviation from classical French cuisine.
2) Louisa, having opened her new restaurant which is receiving the same sort of accolades for innovation as Noma, receives a request for a booking from Marcus Wareing, which she politely declines.
3) Steven, having opened his wildly popular restaurant which serves whacky reconstructions of English pub favourites, gets a call from Louisa re: Item 2). He promptly adds to the menu a new recipe he has been saving for the occasion: Marcus Wareing's Sloppy Spotted Dick.
THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT.
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The first was the attitude of the chef at Mirazur, who clearly saw Craig as someone in whom he saw his younger self. Now, while there could well be a large dollop of sexism there, too, that's also going to have a big holdover influence on the judges***. More importantly, though, the dishes on the chefs' table are served blind, so absent dirty work at the crossroads sexism can't have been a factor here, and the chefs were less enamoured with Louisa's sweetbreads dish than they were with the other three. Add to that two wobbles coming through in the cook-offs, and I think there's enough there to legitimately give Craig the edge in that specific context assuming the two chefs' offerings were equivalently good on the day.
That said, though, I agree wholeheartedly with the predicted outcomes. Quite apart from any other consideration, Louisa is actually the person who's shown time and again that she can run service (notice how in Le Manoir aux Quat' Saisons the head chef basically gave her a quick onceover to see it was happening properly, and then left her and his second in command to get on with it -- again, something which may have told against her in the sense that it gave her less screen time, but which showed her being competent and professional and authoritative.) Craig we've seen do exquisite one-off dishes but time and again struggle to scale that up.
And I'm really pleased about Steven, because I live in Manchester, and if anyone's going to get the benefit of a Bury lad made good, it'll be us.
*And FFS don't read the Twitter feed, 90% of whom are convinced Louisa was only in the final at all because of "quotas" and "PC gone mad"
**Whose resemblance to Billy Boyd as Peregrine Took was so pronounced that in our household we simply called him "the hobbit"
*** You may not remember, but a few years ago Adam Handling, who completely deserved to win, lost in the final after having had such a demoralising experience in one of the top restaurants in the world with some nutter chef who basically was all Jackson Pollock to his Nicholas Hilliard style his form was dented for the final. But can anyone now name the person who won in his year?
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Also, am slightly envious that you will see the benefits of Steven's cooking!
Also also, thanks for reminding me about Adam Handling. I should really go to his restaurant, as it's very close to my workplace.
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I don't recommend starting to watch Masterchef, btw.
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My sympathies
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Re: My sympathies
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