Last night, the bloke and I were half-watching "Grand Designs: Revisited" whilst we attempted to wrangle our inboxes under control. (Sadly, this is not a euphemism.) "Grand Designs", for those who haven't had the pleasure, is a TV programme about city-dwellers who buy a bit of land in the country on which a wreck of a house is usually sited and try to convert it into their dream home. Generally these people have little to no building experience, architectural design ability, or sense. After many trials and tribulations and massive cost overruns, they succeed. This is pretty much middle-class British porn, second only to gardening programmes in the titillation stakes.

This particular episode of "Grand Designs" opened with a mad pair of middle-aged hippies who'd bought some land in the south of France and planned to build a wood and straw-bale house on it. In the middle of an area dominated exclusively by old stone houses. Owned by French people. Who weren't all that keen on the idea.

The narrator, in an attempt to generate a sense of dramatic tension, asked us, "But will they manage to make this work? I'm coming back seven years later to find out." My response to this was immediate and disbelieving. "Dude, of course they make it work. The whole point of this show is that everyone completes their projects. You don't get episodes with storylines like, 'Norma and Frank bought this rotting shell of an old church for half a million pounds five years ago. They budgeted £150k for the restoration. After spending almost £400k, they're bankrupt and divorced. Frank is an alcoholic, Norma has attempted suicide three times in the last six months and their children are in foster care. Isn't that a terrible shame!' This isn't 'Grand Designs: Catastrophic Fuck-ups'."

Although I have to confesss, I would totally give that programme my undivided attention.
liseuse: (Default)

From: [personal profile] liseuse


I would watch your version of that programme. My mother adores Grand Designs, and I can never really work out why. I think I find the predictable arc a little too predictable to bear.

From: [personal profile] miss_haitch


Ahaha, I would watch the hell out of that alternate programme.

I don't have a TV, and when I visit my parents I basically mainline Grand Designs. I have no idea why - I have no desire to watch it when I'm at home. Some people watch True Blood for their guilty pleasure, I watch upper-middle-class people getting stressed about their thatching.
berangere: (Default)

From: [personal profile] berangere


The big question is "Will the Mayor let them do what they want ?"
Building policies in France are not determined by individuals but by the municipalities. There are places where you are not allowed building two-storey houses, or concrete houses, or to use stones that are not the correct colour.
Obtaining a permit to build in France is quite an epic experience. A friend of my mother's bought an old house a few years ago and was appaled to hear afterwards she had not the right to do whatever she wanted with it (Well, her bad, I would say : she's French, she should have known and checked the municipality building policy before buying...).
And thinking, "I'll build it and once it will be over they won't be able to do anything, aha !" will do no good : they come with buldozers to get rid of not consistent buildings and *make you pay for the destruction*.

Well, as you said, this is a TV show, so I think everything will be all right for them. But people thinking about buying a house in France should keep in mind that they should check beforehand if the house of their dreams fills in the town building policy...
trascendenza: ed and stede smiling. "st(ed)e." (Default)

From: [personal profile] trascendenza


This isn't 'Grand Designs: Catastrophic Fuck-ups'
Right? My biggest problem with formula on TV is not that there's a formula. Formula is fine! But if you're going to be formulaic, at least own up to it a little bit and stop trying to draw me in with false cliffhangers.
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