None of those rang a bell, so I went googling, and found http://www.robweir.com/blog/2006/01/jingle-bells-batman-smells.html, with 400+ replies with versions sung. And part way down I found:
"In North East England in the 1980s the lyrics we used were:

Jingle Bells, Batman Smells,
Robin flew away
Lost his pants in the middle of France
And found them in Bombay – hey!"

I'd have heard it a decade earlier and the last two lines don't entirely ring a bell, but "Robin flew away"? Yeah, that.